Storytime with Groose
by potatosaurusrex
Summary: Oneshot Set a couple weeks after the events of my original story, The Legend of Groose: Skyward Pompadour. What wonderful tales does Groose have to share with the youth of Grooseland?


Kukiel and Gully sat on a fallen pillar, watching the fire's flames flicker back and forth in front of them. They intently listened to the figure in front of them, his shadow cast out onto the Statue of the Goddess, his arms making wild gestures as he told his story.

"So there I was, face to face with Ghirahim, sword in hand. We fought for many hours, dueling back and forth. We exchanged blows, and eventually I gained the upper hand. I shoved him aside, and clutched my sword in my hand."

"What happened next?" Gully asked, eager to find out.

"I'm getting to that, these things take time. So there I was, Ghirahim beaten and bloody on the ground. I held up the sword, ready to plunge it into his chest and save the world, which is when I decided to spare him. You see, killing him would have been way too easy, so I decided to let him revive his master, so I could kill them both and save the world even more."

Kukiel looked quizzically at Groose. "Wait… that makes no sense. Why not just end the skirmish there and not have to fight anyone else? It would have been smarter just to kill Ghirahim, right? That makes no logical sense what so ever…"

"It may not make sense… but was it the logical thing to do?"

Gully chimed in, "No."

"Okay, so it may not have been logical, but it was heroic."

"So then what happened?" Kukiel tried to continue Groose's train of thought, although that train ran out of coal a long time ago.

"Oh, uh, I went into an alternate dimension and I killed both of them almost immediately and saved the world all on my own because I was the hero." Groose felt a bead of sweat run down his forehead.

"That's the epic conclusion?"

"Well, uh, you see, I sort of-"

"**Hold it!**" a voice cried out. The two children turned around to see a dark figure standing behind them. His tunic waved in the wind, and the fire's light dashed across his face, showing a grin. Groose gulped.

"Oh, it's you. Where'd you get the tunic?"

"I figured that if I couldn't have my destiny, I could at least have the cool clothes that were supposed to go along with it."

"You're still mad about that? Get over it, that was like a couple weeks ago, holding a grudge is bad for your health, I think."

Link walked over to the side, and sat down next to Groose, setting his hand on his shoulder. "That's not what happened at all." he stated, looking into the kids' eyes.

He noticed Kukiel, staring back at him. "Hey… didn't you die in chapter thirteen?"

"No, Groose saved me." Kukiel responded. "The author probably thought killing a little girl wasn't exactly the best move to make a popular fan fiction."

"So you don't know about my adventure at all?"

"**Your** adventure? This story's about _me_, not you!"

"Not the good side of the story."

"Oh, okay, what's your side of the story, all knowing one?"

"Well, Groose was busy fooling around with Ghirahim. The two basically hit each other like wussies for five minutes before giving up. Meanwhile, I was valiantly fighting off one of Ghirahim's horrible abominations of… bokoblinkind, that wretched robot laser bokoblin leader. He had a thirst for blood, and latched onto my back. I tore him off and began beating him, to which he fought back. I was without a weapon, and he began firing lasers and shooting acid. He had missiles and bombs, and he just kept firing at me. There was a flamethrower in his mouth, too."

"Wait, what the heck are you talking about? There was none of that, with the exception of the lasers. You're making this up, aren't you!"

"Oh, and you weren't?"

Groose and Link quarreled as the children watched intently. This was the most excitement they'd experienced since leaving Skyloft. As the two bickered back and forth, another figure stood behind the children, but they didn't notice. It had been standing there for a while, listening to the tales being shared by its friends.

"I am somewhat disappointed in both of you. That's not what happened at all." She spoke softly, and walked forward. She sat down next to Groose, which prompted him to stick his tongue out at Link. Link simply folded his arms and looked away.

"These two are both exaggerating the truth," Zelda said, "because neither of those descriptions fit what really happened."

"Maybe Groose was…" Link said.

"Are you calling me a liar?" Groose asked, clenching his fist humorously.

"I ain't calling you a truther."

"Both of you, shut up. So there I was, looking all helpless and distraught, waiting for my master plan to be set into action. Sure enough, that idiotic henchman Ghirahim grabbed me, and took me back into the past. It was then that I was going to attack him and kill him, saving the day. Unfortunately, Link and Groose here screwed everything up by coming to my rescue. After killing Ghirahim myself, I scolded these two on everything."

"Wait a minute, you weren't even awake! Ghirahim stole your soul and you passed out in mid air!" Link pointed out.

"Well that's what I _would've_ done if you bumbling idiots didn't try and stop Ghirahim."

Gully and Kukiel were somewhat confused, but they were starting to piece everything together. Their thoughts were interrupted by a voice from above.

"_Implying I could be stopped._" The _fabulous_ man's entrance was spoiled by his lack of judgment, as he fell flat on his face. He got up and sat on the end of the pillar segment where Zelda, Groose, and Link were situated. He scooted down, sending Link flying off the end. He threw his arm around Zelda's back and flicked his tongue.

"Ghirahim… what the heck happened to you?" Groose asked.

"I've been living it up, man…" Ghirahim's eyes were shot, and his posture was off balance. His mind was obviously elsewhere.

"Oh boy, what's this joker going to add?" Link said sarcastically. He brushed himself off as he got up.

"Well, man, if I remember correctly, I was the one who, like, killed my own master, saving the world. I was trying to, like, help you guys kill him all along, you probably don't remember though because you were brainwashed by the bokoblin. Like, he was all part of my plan, too, man."

Gully and Kukiel were puzzled beyond belief. This is when Piper and Wryna showed up, both mothers ready to take in their children for the night. Groose objected to this.

"Hey, where are you going? I'm not even finished yet! You're missing out on the greatest story ever told in history!"

Gully and Kukiel laughed as they ran away from the crazy group of heroes. Their mothers chuckled a bit, not knowing the full extent of the situation. Groose got up and turned to Link.

"**I would've been able to finish had it not been for you!**"

"You were spreading lies, and I couldn't just let you do that!" Link said in his defense.

"Oh, _like you weren't?_" Zelda said, getting up off the fallen pillar.

"I'm high." Ghirahim said, slumping over on the pillar.

The four bickered for a long time. As the fire's last embers burnt out, it left the heroes' disagreement to be lost to the darkness of the night.


End file.
